Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Late Nite Jokes
Jay Leno
Scorcher today. It was so hot, Hillary Clinton became delusional and began claiming she can win the White House . . . no, sorry, that was the regular Hillary. It had nothing to do with the heat.
Yesterday, an estimated 75,000 people attended a Barack Obama rally on the banks of the river . . . . after the rally, Barack feed them all with just five loaves of bread and two fishes.
The oldest serving member of Congress, former Klan member Sen. Robert Byrd, has endorsed Barack Obama for president. That’s got to make Hillary feel good . . . Even the Klan guys are going, “I’m going with the black guy.”
The New York Daily News says that Barack Obama’s biggest problem now is how to get rid of Hillary Clinton “gently.” To which Bill Clinton said, “Good luck with that. Let me know how that’s going.”
Things are not looking good for Hillary. Today, she was thinking of changing her name to Gas Prices just to see her numbers go up.
Conan O'Brien
In a speech this past weekend, Hillary Clinton said John McCain couldn’t be more out of touch. Then she said, “If you’ll excuse me, I’m about to win the Democratic nomination.”
Bill Clinton gave a speech at a high school in Kentucky, and he was 90 minutes late. Clinton told the students, “I’d explain why I’m late but you’re not quite old enough.”
Jay Leno
Scorcher today. It was so hot, Hillary Clinton became delusional and began claiming she can win the White House . . . no, sorry, that was the regular Hillary. It had nothing to do with the heat.
Yesterday, an estimated 75,000 people attended a Barack Obama rally on the banks of the river . . . . after the rally, Barack feed them all with just five loaves of bread and two fishes.
The oldest serving member of Congress, former Klan member Sen. Robert Byrd, has endorsed Barack Obama for president. That’s got to make Hillary feel good . . . Even the Klan guys are going, “I’m going with the black guy.”
The New York Daily News says that Barack Obama’s biggest problem now is how to get rid of Hillary Clinton “gently.” To which Bill Clinton said, “Good luck with that. Let me know how that’s going.”
Things are not looking good for Hillary. Today, she was thinking of changing her name to Gas Prices just to see her numbers go up.
Conan O'Brien
In a speech this past weekend, Hillary Clinton said John McCain couldn’t be more out of touch. Then she said, “If you’ll excuse me, I’m about to win the Democratic nomination.”
Bill Clinton gave a speech at a high school in Kentucky, and he was 90 minutes late. Clinton told the students, “I’d explain why I’m late but you’re not quite old enough.”
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