Thursday, May 15, 2008
Late Nite Jokes
Jay Leno
Hillary Clinton won big in West Virginia last night — 67 percent to 26 percent for Barack Obama. He hasn’t had numbers that low since he went bowling.
You could tell Hillary was pandering to West Virginia voters. Today she said, if elected, she would impose a heavy tax on anyone with teeth.
She gives hope to the American Dream: If you work hard, you can watch someone else become president.
More bad news for Hillary: John Edwards is backing Obama. Barack Obama promised him if he was elected, he would offer Edwards a Cabinet position as secretary of shampoo and highlighting.
Big blowout in West Virginia for Hillary. Which means that one day she could be president of . . . West Virginia.
Her campaign is $20 million in debt. With $20 million in debt . . . she could be president.
Money is so tight in her campaign. Yesterday, I understand she was wearing a rented pantsuit.
Political experts say Hillary Clinton will soon have to face the moment of truth. They campaign and lie to us for six months, and we only get a moment of truth.
Conan O'Brien
Last night, Hillary Clinton won West Virginia with nearly 70 percent of the vote. She would have gotten even more of the vote, but on the way to the polls, some of their houses got a flat tire.
After she won, she said, “It’s not over, and I will never give up.” Then she flew off on her broom and said, “And I’ll kill your little dog too.”
Jay Leno
Hillary Clinton won big in West Virginia last night — 67 percent to 26 percent for Barack Obama. He hasn’t had numbers that low since he went bowling.
You could tell Hillary was pandering to West Virginia voters. Today she said, if elected, she would impose a heavy tax on anyone with teeth.
She gives hope to the American Dream: If you work hard, you can watch someone else become president.
More bad news for Hillary: John Edwards is backing Obama. Barack Obama promised him if he was elected, he would offer Edwards a Cabinet position as secretary of shampoo and highlighting.
Big blowout in West Virginia for Hillary. Which means that one day she could be president of . . . West Virginia.
Her campaign is $20 million in debt. With $20 million in debt . . . she could be president.
Money is so tight in her campaign. Yesterday, I understand she was wearing a rented pantsuit.
Political experts say Hillary Clinton will soon have to face the moment of truth. They campaign and lie to us for six months, and we only get a moment of truth.
Conan O'Brien
Last night, Hillary Clinton won West Virginia with nearly 70 percent of the vote. She would have gotten even more of the vote, but on the way to the polls, some of their houses got a flat tire.
After she won, she said, “It’s not over, and I will never give up.” Then she flew off on her broom and said, “And I’ll kill your little dog too.”
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