Friday, June 27, 2008
Drop Dead !
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Clinton
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
We're Rich. We Can Rent The Lincoln Bedroom
Monday, June 09, 2008
Why Putting Hillary On The Ticket Is a Bad Idea
Sunday, June 08, 2008
Hillary 2012
Wednesday, June 04, 2008
Late Nite Jokes
Jay Leno
The good news is the whole Democratic primary voting process ended tonight . . . the bad news is, the 2012 Democratic primaries start on Thursday.
It looks like Barack Obama has won the nomination. Hillary Clinton is about to drop out. That means Bill Clinton is about to hear those three words he has been dreading: “Honey, I’m home!”
Late Show Top Ten
Top Ten Things Overheard At Hillary Clinton Campaign Headquarters
10. "I can't believe the campaign's over already"
9. "Hillary's changing into her concession pantsuit"
8. "This is more depressing than a Mets game" - He did not say that!
7. "So they're nominating the guy with the most delegates, superdelegates, and states won? Outrageous!"
6. "Did you hear — the marquee melted on Letterman"
5. "Help us, Iron Man!!"
4. "The Senator is in intense negotiations with Jim Beam"
3. "There's a guy here to repossess the watercooler"
2. "It's not the end — you can always get fat and make a global warming documentary"
1. "Is Obama still hiring?"
Conan O'Brien
The Associated Press reported today that Barack Obama has won enough delegates to clinch the Democratic presidential nomination. As a result, Hillary Clinton will concede sometime in the next 30 years.
A new article in Vanity Fair magazine hints that former President Bill Clinton may have had an affair with actress Gina Gershon. The Vanity Fair article also hints that John McCain may have had an affair with Estelle Getty
Jimmy Kimmel Live!
It looks like we finally have a Democratic nominee for president. It looks like Barack Obama has enough delegates to be the nominee. And Hillary Clinton has indicated, privately to friends, who then blab it to news channels, that she is open to the vice presidency. This is great news for Bill Clinton who desperately wants the apartment in New York to himself.
This would mean Obama for president, Hillary for vice president, and Oprah on top of them.
There’s a new Vanity Fair article coming out that insinuates Bill has been kanoodling with actress Gina Gershon. He’s furious about this accusation because now he’s going to have to explain it to Megan Fox.
The article also quotes insiders who say that Bill’s personality changed after his surgery in 2004. Who’s personality doesn’t change after penis enlargement?
Jay Leno
The good news is the whole Democratic primary voting process ended tonight . . . the bad news is, the 2012 Democratic primaries start on Thursday.
It looks like Barack Obama has won the nomination. Hillary Clinton is about to drop out. That means Bill Clinton is about to hear those three words he has been dreading: “Honey, I’m home!”
Late Show Top Ten
Top Ten Things Overheard At Hillary Clinton Campaign Headquarters
10. "I can't believe the campaign's over already"
9. "Hillary's changing into her concession pantsuit"
8. "This is more depressing than a Mets game" - He did not say that!
7. "So they're nominating the guy with the most delegates, superdelegates, and states won? Outrageous!"
6. "Did you hear — the marquee melted on Letterman"
5. "Help us, Iron Man!!"
4. "The Senator is in intense negotiations with Jim Beam"
3. "There's a guy here to repossess the watercooler"
2. "It's not the end — you can always get fat and make a global warming documentary"
1. "Is Obama still hiring?"
Conan O'Brien
The Associated Press reported today that Barack Obama has won enough delegates to clinch the Democratic presidential nomination. As a result, Hillary Clinton will concede sometime in the next 30 years.
A new article in Vanity Fair magazine hints that former President Bill Clinton may have had an affair with actress Gina Gershon. The Vanity Fair article also hints that John McCain may have had an affair with Estelle Getty
Jimmy Kimmel Live!
It looks like we finally have a Democratic nominee for president. It looks like Barack Obama has enough delegates to be the nominee. And Hillary Clinton has indicated, privately to friends, who then blab it to news channels, that she is open to the vice presidency. This is great news for Bill Clinton who desperately wants the apartment in New York to himself.
This would mean Obama for president, Hillary for vice president, and Oprah on top of them.
There’s a new Vanity Fair article coming out that insinuates Bill has been kanoodling with actress Gina Gershon. He’s furious about this accusation because now he’s going to have to explain it to Megan Fox.
The article also quotes insiders who say that Bill’s personality changed after his surgery in 2004. Who’s personality doesn’t change after penis enlargement?
